


Leather Clad Theory

by KainashiDangelo



Category: Glee
Genre: !anti-floormat Kurt, Alternate Ending to Season 3 Episode 17 (Dance with Somebody), M/M, Not Klaine Friendly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-15
Updated: 2015-02-15
Packaged: 2018-03-12 22:56:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,285
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3358388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KainashiDangelo/pseuds/KainashiDangelo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Blaine Anderson sang It's Not Right, But It's Okay to Kurt in the middle of Glee club, one diva has had enough. Not for the faint of heart. Not Klaine friendly. Hell, not even Blaine Friendly. Songfic. Title in the end notes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Leather Clad Theory

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Elphaba_Fiyerobert](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elphaba_Fiyerobert/gifts).



> This fic really did write itself. You can ask Edith. I woke up from a nap, and it was right there, and would not go away until I wrote it all. This is very much against Klaine and Ryan Murphy's pathetic Kurt characterization in the last four seasons. This is how episode 17 would have happened if I was writing the script. :) This story is dedicated to both Edith and Elphaba_Fiyerobert, my two lovely girls. :}

Kurt Hummel had his head bowed, as he sat in his normal chair in the classroom, listening as his boy...no, his EX-boyfriend, sang Whitney Houston to HIM. To the outside world, it may look like he was feeling guilty over whatever perceived injustice that Blaine Fucking Anderson believed that Kurt had committed. 

However, even the meat head at the end of the row, Puckerman, could see the fury boiling underneath the surface of the porcelain tranquility that is the normal image that Hummel gave to the world. The one thing Puck could never understand was this watered down rug that Hummel had become once he started swapping spit with the Hobbit. He almost shivered in delight at the thought of the coming storm. Hobbit Anderson didn't understand the hell he's unleashed. 'The Diva has entered the building,' Puck thought.

As the rest of the gleeks got up and dance around Anderson, Kurt stood after collecting his bag, then left the room. He stormed down the hallway, just daring one of the meat heads from the football team to even say something to him. They must have eaten their Wheaties this morning, because even Karofski seemed to be smart enough to back the freak away from Kurt. Just as he slammed open the outside door, Puck caught up to him and grabbed his arm. "Dude! That was so not cool what the Hobbit did! Whatever you want to do in response, I'm in!"

Kurt turned, his eyes dropping to look at the hand on his arm, then his glasz eyes lifted to meet Puck's brown ones. A perfectly arched brow lifted, and a truly sinful smirk curled across Kurt's lips. "How do you feel about a little Theory?" Kurts husky chuckles combined beautifully with Puckerman's hoots of delight. 

Somewhere behind them, back in the glee room, a certain hobbit with gelled down hair shivered for some reason that he didn't even understand. Even Brittney, dear simple Brittney leaned over to Santana and said, "I can feel the storm coming. I hope the Lightning doesn't scare Lord Tubbington." Santana just blinked and looked at her sometimes girlfriend. "But there's no storm predicted for tomorrow...."

At the next Glee club meeting, Rachel, Mercedes, and Tina were crowded around Blaine. He still had the woe-be-gone look on his face, he looked around to make sure that everyone was still paying attention to him. His eyes darted to the other guys in the club, he wondered why Kurt hadn't called him, begging for his forgiveness yet.

Talk slowed to a stop as Puckerman sauntered into the classroom, wearing a pair of leather pants, and a tight black shirt, carrying his guitar. He went over to Will Shuester, and told him something that made the teacher frown, before nodding and moving to lean against the wall. Puck smirked at the rest of the glee club before pulling a stool to the center of the room and sitting down.

Blaine frowned when he realized that Kurt still wasn't here. He also didn't like the way it seemed that Puck was taking his limelight away. Didn't he know this was HIS week to sing about how he feels? He's about to stand to complain to Mr. Shuester, when Puck begins to play a tune he didn't quite know. That, coupled with the loud, deliberate footsteps just outside the door stopped him in his tracks.

All eyes turned toward the door, and one leather clad leg encased in black thigh high boots with a four inch heel appears. It was soon followed by it's twin, equally encased in black leather. The eyes naturally slide up, noticing the thin, shapely hips and waist that are hugged tightly in more black leather, this time in the shape of a rather infamous corset, with a blood red silk shirt underneath. The vision came to a stop, slim hands resting on those sinful hips. A smirk plays across the bright red lips against the porcelain skin of one Kurt Elisabeth Hummel.   
Before anyone can say anything, Kurt starts to sing to the music as Puck plays, a wicked grin on the jock's face.

~~~Put the bottle down, finally got something to say.   
Take another look around and find someone else to play...  
Needless to say that you've got problems,  
And there's no fucking way that I'm gonna solve them!  
It's never the same, every time you slip, you fall down, down, down~~~

Kurt stalked toward Blaine as he sang. His fingers trail across the other boy's cheeks at 'play', then taps his nose at 'problems' before shoving the little drooling hobbit away with a finger to the forehead at ' no fucking way' before strutting away, swaying his hips around the room as he belts out the lyrics. 

Blaine blinked up at Kurt, unable to comprehend his boyfriend with this...unholy sexual being. However, his eyes harden when he listens to the lyrics, and feels Kurt push him away.

Kurt turned and grinned back at Blaine, his knees bending so that he's almost perpendicular to the floor. 

~~~~Ever wonder what I been thinking about?  
I been thinking 'bout throwing you out!

I'm so happy about you!  
I'm fed up, so get up and get out.  
I'm so happy now we're through  
I'm fed up, so get up and get out!

I was so afraid, now you're goin' away!  
Sent you packing, look who's laughing now!  
I'm so happy that I feel this way,  
I'm so happy that I threw you away!~~~

This time, it was Blaine who's cheeks flush in anger, before he looks around to see the startled looks on his friends list, before noting the gleeful look on Santana and Brittney's faces. In fact, he thought he heard Santana sing under her breath 'And the Bitch, and the Bitch, and the Bitch is back!'

Kurt played up to the song, dancing around Puck and smirking at Blaine at the same time. There was no question as to what Kurt Hummel was saying, and even Blaine, in his most oblivious state, could not see that this was Kurt dumping him. He just didn't understand why.

Kurt grabbed a short stool and sat in front of Blaine, and crossed those long..long legs. He leaned forward, his elbow resting on his knee as he sings to Blaine.

~~~Put your problems down and pick up what's left of the pain.  
And take a good look at yourself and see who's really to blame.  
Needless to say you've got issues.  
There's no fucking way that I'm gonna fix you.  
It's never the same, ever since you went falling down, down, down.

Ever wonder what I been thinking about?  
I been thinking 'bout throwing you out!

I'm so happy about you!  
I'm fed up, so get up and get out.  
I'm so happy now we're through  
I'm fed up, so get up and get out!

I was so afraid, now you're goin' away!  
Sent you packing, look who's laughing now!  
I'm so happy that I feel this way,  
I'm so happy that I threw you away!~~~

Kurt stood as the music came to an end and headed toward the door, and Blaine jumped to his feet. "Kurt, wait! You can't-!" Kurt stopped at the door and turned to look at Blaine with pure loathing in his eyes. "Blaine, I can, and I did. In case you didn't get the memo, I'll spell it out for you. No one, not even Hobbits with horrible fashion sense and even worse hair, pushes the Hummels around. Fuck you, Blaine. We're over." And with that, he turned to leave the room for good, leaving both Santana and Puckerman to hoot and whistle in the background.

**Author's Note:**

> The song is, of course, So Happy, by Theory of a Deadman. Go youtube it. It's freaking awesome. Oh, and Santana's quoting Elton John's The Bitch!


End file.
